I am basically doing pretty well, though my life has become a roller coaster. I am seeing--and in love with--a man who is BiPolar. Man, is that a hard one to cope with. But, for the most part, I think I'm doing well with it. If I can stay relatively calm through his manic and depressive episodes, I must be getting better!

I am paying for the great time I had this weekend. Certain substances I abused tend to drain my serotonin, so I'm down this week. Cranky, nasty, sluggish, unmotivated. Nothing particularly bad, though. In fact, I may be moving from Temp to Regular employee (again) at work soon. My feet are hurting quite a bit today, though.

Worse today. Woke up feeling worthless, unlovable, and that the world is so fucked up there's no point in going on. I wish I didn't have to eat and crap, cause I'd stay in bed forever. I'm not sure how I got out of bed in the first place, much less how I got to work today, but here I am, not interested in doing anything and feeling guilty about being unproductive. So tired of falling for women who aren't interested in me, and women who I'm not interested in trying to get me to spend time with them.

That last one: a woman I had a crush on 15 years ago has reentered my life and has been asking me out. Unfortunately, that crush wore off years ago, and I just can't find the same level of interest.

Dreamer...
I feel your pain...
hang in there...
"...this, too shall pass..." - ABSOLUTELY!
...except for ONE thing...
you ARE dreaming if you think we here in california will
pay less taxes anytime in the near (or distant) future!
;)