i'm completely confused. i applied for disability and now have an offer to do 2 night audit shifts a week at a hotel i like. i'm gonna give it a go.

I posted this on my blog yesterday.

Todays Zen = The Middle Way
First thing this morning I got up to take a poo. I popped a squat and decided to read for a few. I picked up a book and just turned to a random page. And this is what I read from a resilient sage. All I needed to get me through another day. Not much else to say. Here it is.

"The Middle Way is not only a philisophical concept in Zen Buddhism, but a practical one as well. In terms of practice the middle way teaches us to avoid all extremes of thought and action, to hold fast to the golden mean between excess and deficiency. In the practice of Buddhism to exceed may be just as bad as to fall short. We must not tune our strings too tight or too loose, for in neither case can we play music on our lutes. It is only when the strings are at a median degree of taughtness, tense yet flexible, that we can play upon them. Similarly, in cultivating the Way we should avoid blind valor and excess of zeal just as much as lethargy. If we are excessively zealous, then it becomes too easy to lose heart when we meet difficulties and abandon the practice; if we are lazy, we will neglect to practice and go nowhere at all. As a practical concept Mu must also be carefully interpreted in the light of the Middle Way. On the one hand, we should avoid the even more dangerous extreme of nihilism, asserting that since everything is void anything is permissible. Everything may be Mu, but that does not mean that a person can be justified in doing whatever he wants to. As long as we live in this world we must conform to the basic laws which give it structure, the principles of ethics and social harmony, even when we see that the world together with its laws are not final actualities in themselves.

old familiar movies help me. "An Affair To Remember" is a good one.